双相情感障碍：一面是山火，一面是海水 Bipolar disorder ---volcano with ocean

新冠疫情伊始，精神疾病的患者就有近10亿人，这些人包括抑郁症、焦虑症、双相情感障碍症等患者。犹如一趟过山车，心境紊乱，情绪忽高忽低，这就是双相情感障碍症的最大特征。

世人眼中的“天才病”——火山喷发的源泉 

世界名人贝多芬与梵高，在他们灵感迸发，才华横溢之时，都与躁狂有着微妙的联系，因此这种病也被大家称为“天才病”。患者Gaga在三年前确诊了双相情感障碍症。确诊初期，她一直低迷不振，觉得连呼吸都不配。心理方面，对于暴力事件产生了无限的恐惧；开始与人进行毫无攻击性的争吵。生理方面，出现了无征兆的呕吐，下意识地自缢。然而，在药物治疗一段时间后，她进入了情绪高涨期，开始无休止地给自己制定工作计划，仿佛打了鸡血。高效地完成拍摄任务，短期内做了她前30年要做的事情。躁狂期的兴奋会让患者不知疲惫，思维活跃，为潜能和创造力的开发提供有利的条件。

在黑暗的海洋里溺水 

与此相对，患者Mino的双手扎满了刺身，这是她抑郁期时想要经历疼痛感带来刺激所做的事情。当经过十字路口和桥面时，仿佛就有一股力量怂恿着她往虎口撞。最严重的时期，除了死亡，对什么都不感兴趣。不仅如此，当她告诉家人自己生病了，不仅没有得到应有的关心，反而被认为是“疯了”。“你为什么不能坚强一点，找点事情做，你没病，别胡思乱想......”这也许是伴侣，家人，朋友出于关心说的话，殊不知会成为患者的一道疤痕。

然而当今，患者不仅需要承担疾病本身的痛苦，还要接受外界对他们的打击，他们正面临着一场“网络危机”。“人均抑郁”，“网抑云”这些耳熟能详的网络词真的只是一场潮流吗？也许这只会导致越来越多人模糊疾病与情绪的界限。疾病的娱乐化使众人无法察觉到精神疾病的严重程度，真正需要关注的东西被掩盖了。

诊治困境 

双相情感障碍主要分为Ⅰ型（躁狂及抑郁）和Ⅱ型（轻躁狂及抑郁），但早期很容易被误诊为抑郁症，主人公马丁就是其中一个例子。马丁在早期被误诊为抑郁症，在服药后发现症状愈发严重。患者身边的人很容易识别躁狂症的发作，但若患者以抑郁起病，恢复后转为轻躁狂症状，则会被误以为是抑郁恢复的状态。

目前已经发现了大脑的神经生物学的病理基础，这对双相情感障碍症的患者来说无疑是一个好消息。然而，每一种药物都有其副作用。与其他科室的药物相比，精神药物见效慢，副作用大，造成的等待时间会让患者失去信心，认为治疗无效。Gaga在治疗初期也充满怀疑，担心自己是否会依赖上药物，用了将近1年的时间才决定服药，并且也确实感受到了药物治疗为她的情绪稳定带来的好处；患者马丁调侃道自己练就了一门催吐的本领。

情感支持 

在治愈过程，给患者一个安全的环境，让其畅所欲言，表达自己的看法。作为陪伴者，我们能看见，理解患者的想法时，通常她们的情绪就会又很大的改善。三年的治疗时间，Gaga的状态有了明显的好转，因为她有一个很好的伴侣，随时会给她打电话。陪伴者，就如同一张网兜，在他们掉下来时，随时兜住。我们只需要以一个接纳的心态去倾听，甚至不需要给出任何的意见。

生活方式的转变让人产生了一种无需面对面交流的幻觉，然而，真实触碰的感觉是虚拟世界永远无法提供的。彼此真实的连接，会给患者感受到爱。这一种爱，能拯救迷失的灵魂，但这种爱不是错位的爱，而是来自内心的理解与接受、包容与信任、平等与互助，爱本无罪，不要让冷漠和偏见挟持了这最温暖的力量。

 

 

More than one billion persons have experienced mental health problems since the outbreak of Covid-19,  including depression, anxiety disorder and bipolar disorder(BD). Similar with roller coaster, the emotions of patients who suffer from BD would be up and down randomly. 

Disease of creative geniuses---volcanic eruption

The experience when famous people such as Ludwig van Beethoven and Vincent Willem van Gogh burst of their inspiration and talent have a subtle connection with mania, so BD is also known as disease of geniuses. Gaga has been diagnosed of BD three years ago. At the preliminary stage, she was so depressed and she felt that she was not deserve to breathe. Psychologically, she started fearing violent affairs and raised non-aggressive argument with others. Physiologically, she began to vomit without any warning and even committed suicide subconsciously. However, she became stimulated and excited after taking medicine. As if she was full of beans, Gaga began to make a work plan endlessly and completed all of her shooting tasks rather efficiently. It seemed that she had done what need to be finished for at least thirty years in a short period. BD patients would never feel exhausted during mania period. A blessing in disguise, it is this period that evokes their inspiration,  potentials, and creativity. 

Drowning on the dark ocean 

On the contrary, Mino is a patient who suffered from depression for most of time. Mino’s arm is covered with many tattoos because she wanted to experience stimulation through this painful process during depressed time. It seemed like a force urging her to dangerous situation whenever she passed intersection and bridge. More severely, she was disinterested in anything except for death. Mino wasn’t concerned by her family when she told them she was ill but met with a title of ‘madman’. To show concerns, parents and friends responded her with words like “why couldn’t be stronger ; please find something to do; don’t be paranoid ”, but actually these words would be a scar for patient. 

Currently, they not only need to bare the pain of disease but have to accept the strike from outside world. A “network crisis” is hurting BD patients gradually. Have you heard trendy words such as “emo” and “NetEase depression cloud”? They are not a trend but this miserable art would do great harm to people who suffer from mental diseases. It would blur the boundary between illness and emotion. Disease-entertaining covers up the severity of mental problems and people can’t grasp the nature and find out what they need to pay attention. 

Difficulties in diagnosis

There are two types of BD including Ⅰ(mania with depression ) and Ⅱ(hypomania with depression). But it is very easy to misdiagnose as depression at initial stage. There is an example, Martin, who was misdiagnosed and became more serious after taking medicine of curing depression. People around BD patients can easily identify their symptom of mania but if patients start with depression and turn into hypomania status, they would be treated as recuperated.  

The neurobiological pathologic basis of brain has been discovered, which is certainly good news for BD patients. Nevertheless, Each drug has its side effect. Psychotropic drugs are slow to work and have huge side effects, resulting in a long waiting time that make patients lose confidence and consider drugs as ineffective treatment. Gaga doubted it and worried about being addicted to those drugs at the beginning. It took her nearly a year to decide to take the medication and finally got the bonus from it. Martin joked that he has developed a ability to induce vomiting. 

Emotional support

Providing a safe environment for patients to speak up and express their opinions during healing process is rather significant. When patients feel that their ideas and thoughts have been seen and understood by companions, their emotions would be greatly improved. Gaga’s emotion has been changed greatly and she is more positive than before through three-year’s treatment. More importantly, she has a wonderful partner who would call her at any time to help her avoid terrible things. Companions are similar to a net which is used to catch them whenever they fall. Besides, as partners around BD patients, we only need to listen to them with an open mind and it is fine even we don’t share our own opinions and suggestion with them. 

The shift of lifestyle lead people to have an illusion that face-to-face communication is unnecessary. However, the real touching feeling will be never brought by the virtual world. The real connections between persons offer patients a sense of love. This kind of love would rescue patients’ lost soul and it is originated from companions’ inner minds which include their understanding and acceptance, tolerance and trust, equality and mutual help. Love is innocent and don’t miss the warm power of love because of indifference and prejudice.