Humorix: We're a Portal, Too!

Fake News written by James Baughnon March 3, 1999

from the taking-advantage-of-meaningless-buzzwords dept.

[Editor's Note: Watching with envy as other Linux companies jump on the PORTAL bandwagon and rake in huge amounts of money, Humorix has decided to join in. We have issued the following press release announcing that this site will henceforth be called a PORTAL. According to the little known Yahoo! Law of New Media, "Anybody who creates a site that half-way resembles a PORTAL will become a multimillionaire overnight". I suppose I need to check the front door; there's probably a whole horde of Venture Capitalists outside wanting to invest in Humorix already...]

CAPE GIRARDEAU, Missouri, March 3 /HypeNewsWire/ -- Fairly Popular Provider of Linux Humor and Jokes Partners with Underpaid Website Developers to Deliver a Single PORTAL Web Site for Linux Fake News, Unsubstantiated Rumors, and Funny Links

Humorix World Domination, Inc. (HumorWorld Booth # 1926), the somewhat popular provider of Linux humor and jokes, today announced a new Linux PORTAL that provides millions of Linux users with a single Web site to access the latest fake news, unsubstantiated rumors, and funny links for the world's fastest-growing operating system.

"Humorix continues to aggressively expand the resources for the Linux community by calling its website a PORTAL," announced James Baughn, Founder, President, CEO, Keeper of the Root Password, Modest Creator of Bogus Job Titles, and Lord High Editor for Humorix World Domination, Inc. "Humorix's name recognition and shady reputation will allow us to deliver even more humor resources through its PORTAL to the booming Linux user community."

More than 10 million users currently run the Linux operating system. According to YDC Research, Linux was the fastest-growing server operating environment in 1998, capturing more than 17 percent of all server operating system shipments. A new survey in LinuxPlanet showed that 0.04 percent of those polled cite Humorix as the most recognized source for Linux humor.

The Humorix PORTAL Web Site provides a one-stop Internet resource that makes it tremendously easy for Linux users to waste their time.

About Linux

Linux® is the cooperatively developed POSIX-oriented, multi-user, multi-tasking, buzzword-compliant, monopoly-free, hyphen-enriched operating system used worldwide. Linux is strongly differentiated from virtually all other operating systems because it is "open source"®©(TM)(SM) software, with the source code freely available to all users who can understand obfuscated C/C++ code. Unlike binary-only operating systems that restrict access to the source code, Linux benefits from a worldwide community of highly experienced programmers, technically savvy academics, and outspoken zealots who have the access to enhance and improve the system. Linux is used as an exceptional-value, fully functional, anti-Microsoft UNIX® workstation for Internet servers and other applications.

About Humorix World Domination, Inc.

Founded in 1998, Humorix is based in the boondocks of Southeast Missouri, where its underpaid, overworked staff maintain the somewhat popular Humorix PORTAL web site. Humorix contines to gain recognition in the Linux community: it was named Buy-An-Award.com's "Carpal Tunnel Site of the Millisecond" for three consecutive milliseconds, and has been listed under Yahoo's "Sites We Recommend If You Have Nothing Better To Do" hierarchy.

The Open Directory Project describes Humorix as "The most dangerous and subversive of all Linux websites. Run by true Linux terrorists."

For more information about Humorix, please visit our PORTAL web site at http://humorix.org/

LINUX is a trademark of Linus Torvalds. OPEN SOURCE is a trademark/service mark/certification mark/whatever of the organization Eric S. Raymond and/or Bruce Perens are currently serving under this week. UNIX is a closed registered trademark of The Open Group of Oxymorons.

All other names and trademarks are the property of their respective owners (most likely Microsoft Corporation).

Contact:

Say Hi to Hype Media Relations, Inc.
for Humorix World Domination
Mark Eating, PR Representative, humorix@fake-pr.com

 

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What is this?

Humorix shows the lighter side of Linux®,the Open Source(sm) operating system everyoneand their brother are suing over(tm). Jokes about Microsoft®,the SCO fiasco(tm),and poorly-conceived copyright laws are thrown in for good measure(patent pending).See the About page for details.

The fake news articles that appear here have been written by James Baughnor various contributors. If youwould like to contribute a funny article, send it in!